April 18, 2012


You know what makes me feel totally whole, full and overflowing with zest? Friendship. Personal, giving, nonjudgmental friendships.

Call me curious. Call me nosy. I just love people.

I suppose my favorite type of interactions fall along the lines of "dating" or cultivating a deep friendship. I like meeting, talking, diving into the stories of the other person.

Whenever I have the chance to be in great company, with great conversation I am rejuvenated. I am filled. My cup begins to over flow. I can't stop smiling and I leave feeling renewed and passionate about people. Beautiful people with beautiful gifts to offer.

The past several months here at Ohio University have been hard for me. I have not easily found relationships, friends, people who have time to talk-- meaningful 'life' kinda talks. Matt has made some really good friendships, but they are his friends and they are his busy graduate school friends. :)  
So I miss my friends...


I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that this chapter, just like every other chapter of my life, it very God intended. My lack of 'friends' and 'conversation' is just another way for me to explore myself more. If I find comfort in my relationships with others, what about my relationship with myself? I have had to find new ways to be inspired, filled and joyed. I have had to change my mindset about what gives me worth and value.

My time of being a trailing spouse, doing my own self discovery and trudging through life without best friends by my side has got to make me a stronger person. Not only is it helping sharpen some of my weaker characteristics, but when I am in a place of having deep friendships again-- I will soak them up, relish them and value them more than ever before.

This brings me to a characteristics test I recently took. Matt and his classmates were told to take this test for his Positive Psychology class so I decided to take it as well. It was pretty exciting to see what qualities I possess at the top of the list... but as the numbers get bigger and I possess less and less of each characteristic you can see what I need to work on. And this time here 'alone' in Athens is possibly the perfect time to sharpen some of those lacking qualities. Here's to becoming more brave!

For anyone wondering about my friendship with my husband-- oh he is my best friend, hands down, he is my everything. But sometimes it's just nice to have a chica around, sharing the same struggles, encountering the same questions and doing her best to find the answers with me. That is what I miss. I miss my girls.

Take the test for yourself at: http://www.viame.org/survey/Account/Register

Here are my strengths:

Your Top Character Strength

You are aware of the good things that happen to you, and you never take them for granted. Your friends and family members know that you are a grateful person because you always take the time to express your thanks.

Your Second Character Strength
Social intelligence
You are aware of the motives and feelings of other people. You know what to do to fit in to different social situations, and you know what to do to put others at ease.

Your Third Character Strength
You have strong and coherent beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the universe. You know where you fit in the larger scheme. Your beliefs shape your actions and are a source of comfort to you.

Your Fourth Character Strength
You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well.

Your Fifth Character Strength
You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you.

Character Strength #6
You are a careful person, and your choices are consistently prudent ones. You do not say or do things that you might later regret.

Character Strength #7
You do not seek the spotlight, preferring to let your accomplishments speak for themselves. You do not regard yourself as special, and others recognize and value your modesty.

Character Strength #8
Appreciation of Beauty & Excellence
You notice and appreciate beauty, excellence, and/or skilled performance in all domains of life, from nature to art to mathematics to science to everyday experience.

Character Strength #9
Treating all people fairly is one of your abiding principles. You do not let your personal feelings bias your decisions about other people. You give everyone a chance.

Character Strength #10
You are an honest person, not only by speaking the truth but by living your life in a genuine and authentic way. You are down to earth and without pretense; you are a "real" person.

Character Strength #11
Thinking things through and examining them from all sides are important aspects of who you are. You do not jump to conclusions, and you rely only on solid evidence to make your decisions. You are able to change your mind.

Character Strength #12
You excel as a member of a group. You are a loyal and dedicated teammate, you always do your share, and you work hard for the success of your group.

Character Strength #13
You forgive those who have done you wrong. You always give people a second chance. Your guiding principle is mercy and not revenge.

Character Strength #14
You work hard to finish what you start. No matter the project, you "get it out the door" in timely fashion. You do not get distracted when you work, and you take satisfaction in completing tasks.

Character Strength #15
You self-consciously regulate what you feel and what you do. You are a disciplined person. You are in control of your appetites and your emotions, not vice versa.

Character Strength #16
Although you may not think of yourself as wise, your friends hold this view of you. They value your perspective on matters and turn to you for advice. You have a way of looking at the world that makes sense to others and to yourself.

Character Strength #17
Regardless of what you do, you approach it with excitement and energy. You never do anything halfway or halfheartedly. For you, life is an adventure.

Character Strength #18
You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery.

Character Strength #19
You like to laugh and tease. Bringing smiles to other people is important to you. You try to see the light side of all situations.

Character Strength #20
You excel at the tasks of leadership: encouraging a group to get things done and preserving harmony within the group by making everyone feel included. You do a good job organizing activities and seeing that they happen.

Character Strength #21
Love of learning
You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn.

Character Strength #22
Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible.

 Character Strength #23
You expect the best in the future, and you work to achieve it. You believe that the future is something that you can control.

Character Strength #24
You are a courageous person who does not shrink from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain. You speak up for what is right even if there is opposition. You act on your convictions.


  1. Katie, I loved this post! So sweet and honest! It looks like you're starting this road with some great perspective, I think God is going to bless you with the strength you need and eventually the friends you need for this new chapter!

    1. Thank you Serena. I'm finding that being honest with myself has been a great part of this experience. All those things that I could dismiss or breeze through about myself are becoming more evident during this 'alone' time. I'm looking forward to what God has in store for my relationships here! Thanks for the comment, it means a lot!

  2. I love this post too. Man I think getting to "Me" can be....awful. Lol. At least in my experience. But only awful in the same way that pulling a thistle from the roots and slipping onto some nettles can be awful...or getting your hair messed up in a warm summer rain.
    It's not REALLY awful...it's just hard.
    But you're right, it takes bravery and I know that you are both inwardly beautiful and brave.
    So keep up the good work my dearest dearest friend. self love is a must.

  3. YAY! I do think you've very humble and that you rejoice in the success of others. That's why you have soooo many friends. I am stealing this!

  4. Oh Alicia thank you so much. That is a real compliment, thank you. I just wish I had more friends since Bluffton... ;). Steal away, if you post it on your blog I'll be interested to see :)